Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the boy ask a question to the girl?
There were four people in a helicopter: Trump, a first-grade kid, a schoolteacher, and the Chinese leader.
There were only three parachutes. The Chinese leader takes one and jumps. The schoolteacher says she has to teach, so she jumps. Trump and the first-grader are left. Trump says, "I've lived my life; you take the last one." So the kid puts on his backpack and jumps. Trump makes it out safe.
Denki: Hey Mineta, I have a joke.
Mineta: ...go on...
Denki: Ochako's booty.
Mineta: I don't get it?
Denki: Exactly.
Mineta: *cries T_T*
How to run from Iran?
Iran away!
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair. 😎
Here via westwingman.net from Veep!
I was talking to my friend, and he said, "I lost my virginity to a girl, and then she stopped coming to school." And I said, "Probably because she was fired."
Why did the lion say, "I'm faster than you," to the cheetah?
Because it was Halloween!
ANAND
What did the orphan say to the other?
"Robin, get the Batmobile!"
What do a gay guy in a wheelchair and a tomato have in common?
They’re both a fruit AND a vegetable!
How do gay guys finish prayer?
“GAYMEN!”
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple? An apple gets picked.
What's the difference between a phone and a girl? You can turn it off whenever you want.
I saw my friend hang themselves. My response was, I guess they wanted to hang with someone.
My favorite species is a cheetah because
Ima cheet-ah on the test.
My sister said I'm stupid and I'm a baby, and I said, "Oh, I didn't know we were talking about you."
Rocks are used too much; people take 'em for granite.
What animal can't you trust with your homework?
A: A cheetah!
Why don't chickens and sheep get along?
Because they have beef between them.