It must have been a sad day when you slithered out of the abortion bucket.
Worst Jokes Ever
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
You.
You who?
Who do you see over there???
My bully: Your face is ugly.
Me: Yeah well your mom is so fat she broke the stairway to heaven.
My bully: :(
Who needs Singles Day when you're single for the rest of your life!
Father's Day is a dad joke.
Why have sex when you can perv on your neighbor's grandma!
I tried to eat ass once. The donkeys got one hell of a kick!
Herpes? No, I don't want her. Her pees.
If a tomato is a fruit, is ketchup a smoothie?
Easy way to get away from rape is to become the rapist. All women need to carry a 12-inch dildo and a gun!
What's white, red, blue, and brown all over?
The American flag I used to wipe my ass with.
I don't see why women are complaining about the glass ceiling. I mean, if they reach high enough, they can clean it...
What is red, white, and blue all over?
A dead cop.
They say the polar ice caps are melting, good, because my wife's a fat, cold bitch.
I went on a date with an Eastern European chick. She got mad because I rushed her...
Get it? It's Russia, and I rushed her.
I would roast you but burning trash is bad for the environment.
What do you call staring stares?
Stares.
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Don’t worry, he woke up.
In my basement.
A colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence.
Jane ate her friend’s sandwich.
Jane ate her friend’s colon.
"Go frick a cow!"
"I already fricked your mother."
