What do you call somebody in America that is smart?
An immigrant.
Worst Jokes Ever
What is white and 9 inches?
Nothing.
What does a cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?
He wipes his butt.
Why do people always bully orphans?
'Cause what can they do? Tell their parents?
People be like: "What happened to Fruit Ninja? It was on your phone."
Me: "I upgraded, now I can play on my pro max thigh/wrists."
What did Elon Musk do after sacking half of Twitter employees?
Raped an eight-year-old girl.
So, my girlfriend left me. I took her wheelchair, and she came back crawling.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
A dragon.
A dragon who?
The dragon gonna drag its balls across your face.
Holy fucking shit, Addison, watersharky, Gwen, and all of you other cringelords, I swear to God if I hear one more thing about "please be kind, no bullying on the internet," I will actually shoot my local school.
You may not know, since you are only 8 years old or whatever, but the world is not kind. It’s full of sick people out to beat others, and the only way to stay safe is to beat them. So even if you think you are spreading kindness, it’s just gonna make you a target. So just stfu and keep your "please be kind" messages to yourselves.
What do you call a person with no body or a nose?
Nobody knows.
How many children does it take to change a lightbulb?
Not 15, as my basement's still dark.
Sister: Why does shampoo have directions?
Me: 'Cause God made you.
Everybody add @christianisni22 on Snap!
He's a hot babe and he's single.
What does a ripped jacket and a golfer have in common?
They both have a hole in one.
Why is the blind kid popular?
He can't see the middle fingers.
Why are orphans banned from the shop?
No adult to pay for them.
I bought this happy birthday card for this orphan.
To: The Orphan
From: ______
I told this man to rev his vehicle.
Didn't know wheelchairs can't rev.
What do an M&M and juice have in common?
Window.
I killed 5 orphans and tried to sell their organs.
Nobody still wanted them.
