Worst Jokes Ever
Uranus is pronounced "ur anus."
Replace the v in Venus with a p.
Follow me.
I heard a noise, so I'm dead.
Why do-- wait, what am I saying? What am I talking about?
I don't usually make 9/11 jokes. They always go down in flames.
Why does Donald Trump love little boys?
Because his hands look massive when he’s holding their tiny little cocks.
I was at a funeral and made a joke. No one laughed, but someone died.
What do you call a cute door?
Adorable.
What's hard and hairy on the outside and soft and wet on the inside? Coconut, what were you thinking of?
What's long and hard and has c*m in the middle? Cucumber. What were you thinking?
Brinnia so fat when she stepped on a scale, it said, "I need a bigger one."
There was a school fire. I pushed the wheelchair kid into the fire and said, "Hot wheels!"
Q: What's an orphan's favorite game?
A: The Sims 4, because then they can simulate having a family.
You know, 9/11 jokes aren't funny, they're just PLANE wrong!
My dog died today. 😥
qwertyuiol.
The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza. Instead, they got a plane.
911 what's your emergency?
"Burning in toaster."
"Toast?"
"Yeah so your calling 911 because of burnt toast?"
"Set fire to my forest!"
Why do midgets run on balls?
Because the grass tickles them.
Your hairline and the universe have one thing in common: they’re yet to be discovered.