Never

Never jokes

Explorer

    • Hi there! My name is Michael Grover, and I am an explorer. Ever since I’ve been little, I’ve loved searching for new things. As a baby, my parents kept finding me in nooks and crannies around the house. “On the search,” as they would say.

    By the age of 5, I had been to every continent on the planet, barring Antarctica. For my 12th birthday, my parents got me diving lessons, and by the time I was 13, I could scuba dive to a depth of 40 meters, as well as go cave diving.

    I got a pilot’s license by the age of 17, and I learned to sail just before my 18th birthday. Instead of going to university, I decided to travel around South America, exploring its rich jungles and beautiful landscapes.

    During my trip, I met my now wife who was also an explorer. For our honeymoon, we sailed around the Caribbean, and we discovered 3 new islands which we named after the cats that I had growing up.

    Over the course of my life, I have come across great treasures and wondrous experiences. But in all my life, and in all my travels, I’m afraid I have never come across a single person who cared about what you just said.

  • 4

    • Girl

    • I asked a girl I met if I could take her out to dinner.

    The joke is I knew right after she said, "I'll call you," she was lying to me, not surprised even a little.

    The next joke was a part of me hoped she would call, but did I really think she was going to? I'll never be good enough for anyone, what was I thinking, why did I even bother to ask her in the first place? I think it was just to prove I was right, I'm unwanted.

    LONELINESS EQUALS SADNESS.

    Dick

    • I suck his dick with a smile for hours at a time.

    Stare at his nutsack while I hold back my cum tonight.

    And when he ask me what position I say, "Doggystyle." (And when they ask me what position I say, "Doggystyle.")

    But the fact is I can never get off of his fat dick. And all that they can ask is (Ask is, ask is) "I just wanna smack it" (I just wanna smack it)

    Here's what the fact is He can put my asshole in a casket (Yuh, yuh, yuh) Asshole in a casket

    So you can see I'm cummin' But you won't see me nut. And I'll just keep on suckin', I'm good (Yeah, I'm good)

    And if he sucks my glizzy I will become dizzy But it keeps us busy, I'm good (Yeah, I'm good)

    I've been twerking for boys for so long I've been flirting with boys for so long

    My jaw's been hurting for so, so long it's real So long, it's real, so long, it's real

  • 2

    • Trump

    • I'm Canadian, and I admit we've done some stupid things. But we've never given nuclear launch codes to a literal retard.

  • 4
    • Never memes

    Student

    • If you are a student at law school, a law professor can charge you up to $98,998.00 for one semester.

    If the law professor is very late and is not punctual to teach you anything about law in his class, should a law student be able to charge the law professor a certain amount of money for not being able to teach his class because he is off task and not being punctual? Is your time precious too?

    If the law professor is Polish, now you know the reason why you should never go to a law school that has a "dumb polack" for a law professor.

    Sorry for your luck; it sucks to be you!

  • 2

    • Autism

    • Boy: Have you heard of the cool kid who just told us he had autism?

    Teacher: What?

    Boy: Well... never mind, he's well supported.

  • 2

    • Conviction

    • Donald Trump is to white Americans as O.J. Simpson is to black Americans. They will never choose to convict these people even if they murdered or raped.

  • 1

    • Loop

    • If you wait for a woman to get 9 months pregnant and kill her, you will never be able to stop the loop.

    Birth

    • Daughter: Where was I born?

    Dad: Alabama.

    Daughter: That is nice.

    Mum: We have never been to Alabama.

    Dad: RUN!

    Homework

    • What starts with S and ends with S? STUPID HOMEWORK NEVER ENDS.

    What starts with C and ends with K? Children do not cook.

    What did you think I was going to say? How bold of you to assume.

    Keyboard

    • More random keyboard words made into sentences:

    This was a joke that was made by someone who had never been to the game before, but who was the first person to make it into a game of game with the intention of being able to play the first person who played it.