You know when you sign up for something and it says "I'm not a robot"? I guess he never had the chance to tick that.
Guess Stephan Hawkins never had use sweatcoinđ
The fact that Hawkins rhymes with walking and talking yet he could never do any of them
looks like he never charged up fully
Never invest in funerals. It's a dying industry.
riddle: I don't move, I travel across the world, but I never leave the corner. what am I?
answer: a stamp
Stephen Hawking never wrote a book... it was a Dragon who was naturally speaking.
what did one brick say to the other. Never LEGO
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
They can never make it home.
This gay guy was so happy with his new boyfriend that he took him to his favorite gay bar. An hour or so goes, then the new flame says, I just LOVE this place, everyone is so nice,food is great, but what's up with the monkey way down there? His friend ok, Watch this. He goes up behind the chimp and smacked him in back of its head. The monkey jumped off the stool,pulls down his zipper and gives him head. When finished, the chimp took a napkin,cleaned himpulled up his zipper then jumped to his chair. Walked back to his new gay friend and said what do you think of that? MAN, I seen some amazing things, but never like that! His squeeze said wanna give it a try? I sure do, JUST DON'T hit me as hard as you hit that monkey. how's that?
What pool never runs dry?
The one on the Titanic.
My daughter said i could never make a car out of spaghetti, you should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!!!!
50 Thumbs up for 10 jokes you Ěve never seen!
You never told me you were part orangutan, have you considered taking a vacation to Planet of the Apes?
Dark Humor is like a child with cancer. It never gets old.
Why was the ocean so blue? Because the island never waved back.
I was at the bar with a friend, and he said to me, "Veronica, I just stopped a rape." The bartender overheard him and had a puzzled look on his face, because he never moved. He then said, "I saw this girl walk into the bathroom, and I decided not to go."
What can you serve but never Eat. a volley ball
The titanic was going through the ocean. Chuck Norris was on the ship and they never crashed into an iceberg, he just shat off the front of the ship
So one time this really rich guyâs sonâs birthday was coming up. So he asks his son what he wants. So the son says âcan i have pink ping pong balls.â The father asks why and his son stays silent. The dad decides to get it for him. The dad doesnât see the son ever do anything with them. A year later the dad asked him what he wants the son then says âcan I have 10000 pink ping pong ballsâ. The dad then responds with âson why, I gave you some last year and this whole year you did not play with them.â The son, yet again stays silent. The Dad was reluctant to do it but did it anyways. Now a few years later the son is now 20 and his rich dad and him have not seen each other in a while. So the dad decides to celebrate his sons birthday. He asks his son once again what he wants and his son says âcan I have 10000 pink ping pong balls.â His dad screams â SON WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THESE BALLS!!! I NEVER SEE YOU WITH THEM AND YET YOU STILL WANT MORE. WHAT THE HELL!!!â The son yet again stays silent. The dad, though a little pissed, decides to buy As much of the pink ping pong balls that he sees and gives it to his son. The son is happy, but does not do anything. Now after a while the sones about 30, and he and the father are more distant than ever. The father gets a call from a hospital telling him that his son could die from a disease that only 2 people survived. So the father goes there and starts crying and grieving. Then he asks his son what he would like before he dies. The son then says âcan you buy me all of the factoryâs that produce pink ping pong balls.â His dad doesnât question because he is to sad to and buys him the only factory that produces pink ping pong balls. Then the doctors put him in a wheelchair and follow the dad and they take him to one of pink ping pong ball factoryâs and the dad says âokay son I fulfilled what you wanted. But what have you done and what do you plan to do with all of these pink ping pong balls .â The son ,ignoring the question says â this is magnificent. My final wish is that I stay here overnight.â So the doctors and the father decide to and everyone goes home to sleep. The next day, everyone returned to the factory to find all the pink ping pong balls gone and the son. The father was sad but a little angry and decided to search his whole house to find pink ping pong balls but doesnât find any and they search the whole factory for the son and the balls. And soon they end up searching the whole earth and never found him.
