Never jokes
Why do I only date orphans?
Because they never have daddy issues.
Never trust a donkey; they are always full of shit.
I would tell a pussy joke, but you would never get it.
Roses are red, the sky is blue, what do you do? Oh, never mind, I'm not homo like you.
The teacher says to do your homework. I do. My friends do. One person never does any of his homework.
Eventually, we had to have fun. He said he didn't do it. WOW what did he do? I like to think he got smacked and nearly committed suicide.
Do you want to hear a joke about paper?
Never mind, it's tear-able.
They told me I could never be an actor.
No one suspected me when they went missing the next day.
My grandfather never threw anything away, bless him. He died in the war holding on to a hand grenade.
What's black, anorexic, dumb, and will never get a girlfriend?
Me.
Why is the sea salty?
Because the land never waves back.
What present can a pimp always buy his hoes to both show how much he thinks of them and know they can never get enough of?
Condoms!
Why should you never give Elsa a balloon?
'Cause she will let it go.
Two men are next to each other. One looks at the other and asks, "Are you a fascist?"
The other man responds, "No, why would I be?"
The first man pulls out a gun and says, "Are you sure?"
The second man says, "Never mind, I am a fascist!"
Wanna hear a joke about pizza?
Never mind, it’s too cheesy! 😅
Girls are like volcanoes.
You never know when they will erupt.
Do you know why you should never let a blonde handle grenades?
They'll end up only throwing the pin.
That one person who can never bring a smile to your face...
Until you push them down 3 flights of stairs.
My friend Jimmy said his dad is exactly like Santa. I asked, "Why is it because he gives people presents?" Jimmy told me, "No, it's because I hear so many good things about him and how he's gonna come home, but never see him."
The other day my wife said, "Take me someplace I have never been before!" I said, "Why don't you try the kitchen?"
I know that my jokes are never punny but...