My jokes

What's strong enough for a man but made for a woman?

The back of my hand.

My grandpa died during World War II. He was the best concentration camp guard they have ever seen. RIP.

I told my doctor I was experiencing some back pain. He told me to smoke some weed because I had chronic back pain.

A donut is not empty inside, that was a hole in the middle. If I'm a donut, the hole used to be where I put my feeling and happiness, but people snatch it away from me.

Anyway, can someone put a hole in my physical body too? I kinda wanted to see people cry for me just like how people cry for Ace from One Piece.

A man goes into Heaven and there he meets Jesus. He asks Jesus what that broken clock is there for. Jesus says, "That is Mother Teresa’s clock, it has never moved because she has never lied."

"There is Abraham Lincoln's clock. He has lied twice so it has moved twice."

"Where is Donald Trump’s?" asks the man. Jesus answers, "It is in my office, I am using it as a ceiling fan."

My friend was a victim of a school shooting once, but he couldn't tell if they were in the library because of the suppressor on his AR.

People at my school have started to wear Logan Paul merch. I try to give them a high five, but they always leave me hanging.

I'm sorry my jokes are so bad.

My wife is mad that I have no sense of direction. So I packed up my stuff and went right.

I started a new job. My boss said, "Hi, my name is Rebecca, but people call me Becky." I said, "My name is Kyle, but people call me Dick."

She said, "How do you get Dick from Kyle?" I replied, "You just ask nicely."

A man goes into heaven and there he meets Jesus. He asks Jesus what that broken clock is there for. Jesus says, "That is Mother Teresa's clock, it has never moved because she has never lied." "There is Abraham Lincoln's clock. He has lied twice so it has moved twice." "Where is Donald Trump's?" asks the man. Jesus answers, "It is in my office, I am using it as a ceiling fan."

If you want to see my foes, bring a shovel and bring a map and a getaway car just in case we get caught.

Check out my new song. It’s called “Nlggas in the hood,” and it’s really good, so go listen.

My friend's man has seizures, so guess who won their breakdancing tournament.

Hey, Mom, I am ugly.

"Facts," my mom says.

I always felt like a man trapped in a woman's body. But then I was born.

But in my defense, I was young then, and I had a womb without a view.

What did the woman say to Michael Jackson at the beach?

"Excuse me, sir, you're in my son."

I like my humans like I like my chicken... Fully cooked.

The shark bit me and I feet red down my legs.

Kid: I got homework.

Mom: Ok, so?

Kid: I got a F in my balls.