My jokes
I am the worst joke ever. Get it? My whole life is a joke.
Today a girl asked me how big my dick is, so I asked how big her pussy is, and she said, "Come over to my house and find out!"
Hi, you guys don't know me, but I have my best interests at heart.
I'm a kind person who wants to put a stop to the bullying. I think that Gwen, Addison Banks, Watersharky, ect. are kind people! Also, I kinda like Watersharky...
To all my bullies: don’t call me gay because I’m not happy.
My girlfriend said she's having a horrible time with her period. I ask her which one, but realize she's not talking about school...
We don't see each other very much.
How emos propose: Would you please join my family tree?
Hi, my name isn't Pi.
Look up at the sky and wonder why.
Why are you alive?
To all the children on this website, hello!!!!! Hey!!!! How is life treating you?
(BTW I'm a kid, too. I'm Hayley, and I'm turning 13. My B-day is 10/08/2008.)
A kid is learning about planets in school, when he hears the planet Uranus. Knowing it's the perfect opportunity for a joke, the kid replies, "Where's my anus?"
My favorite website.
Somebody’s son said, "Mom, my dick has white stuff coming out of it." She said, "Oh, good one, son, so when’s the baby coming?"
After I am dead during my funeral service, I want someone to play my favorite song by Boy George and Culture Club, "Church of the Poison Mind."
My parents came back from their vacation in Florida, and all I got is this lousy nursemaid from Miami named mammie.
Two people about to have sex realize they have no lube.
In their desperate, horny haste, they looked for the nearest "Downy" and asked it, "Speak into my hand."
Upon their return to the bed, they regretted it immediately because his dick just stayed down...
Lol, I keep stealing my dad's medication money, and the best part is he never remembers.
I’ll never forget my grandpa's last words to me...
“Are you still holding the ladder??”
When other people tell a joke, 3/3 people laugh.
When I tell a joke, 1/3 people laugh, but 2/3 people stare into my soul.
Normal Europe: Oh no, I lost my iPhone!
Amish: Oh no, I lost my potato!
When my dog barks, he gets ruff.
Why did the mushroom kill himself?
Because he had a mushy life.
My peepee small.