My jokes
I don't get why cancer is so hard to beat. My friend's already on stage 4.
My friend: You really need to stop the SH jokes.
Me: But they're not that long.
My favorite film is The Hunchback of Notre Dame.
I love a protagonist with a twisted back story.
My grandad and your hairline go way back.
Lmao Trump and Putin dislike my jokes! 🤣😂
To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office: I will find you... You have my Word.
My mom and I went to a bank. Hard to say I never heard of it. The name is "Addison Banks."
LOL
My depressed body would look great hanging from a tree...
My grandpa asked me to pass him his phone, but I passed him a calculator. He couldn't tell the difference.
Things to kids:
Dragapult: "Ooh, look! Some ammo."
A Good Parent: "My baby!"
Michael Jackson: (HeeHee)
I think one of my dads might be gay.
Dang, it got ketchup on my sleeve. What do I do?
Spread the love!
I caught my mom licking up and down and deep throating a banana. I said, "Why are you doing that?" She replied, "I’m doing it for practice for who could suck the best dick contest in the neighborhood."
I love you like my cuts.
Deeply.
What do you call my IP? 74.125.224.72 hahahahahahahahaha
I held on to my money stronger than an orphan holds on to a teddy bear on Father's Day.
Person: My left ear is ringing.
Friend: Then answer it!
What's the difference between me and cancer?
Well, my dad couldn't beat cancer.
Dad: How was your trip to the park?
Daughter: It was good until the man came along.
Dad: *gasps* Whatever happened, it wasn't your fault, but tell Daddy, what happened?
Daughter: He made my friends go away so it was just me and him... then he took my dress off...
Dad: Oh God, what next?
Daughter: Nothing, that was it.
Dad: Oh, come on! That wasn't exciting, make something up!
Lady: I am going to come to your house.
Man: Ok.
An hour later, the lady is at the man's house. The man meets her outside of the house.
Man: You are going to cum to my house!
And then he fucks her.