My jokes

Ctrl, Alt, Deletus, because of thine fetus.

What's the difference between my dad and cancer?

My dad didn't beat the cancer.

My uncle died on 9/11. Her last words were "Allahu Akbar."

I look at an orphanage, then hug my mum. He just looks sad and crude because he couldn’t find his mum.

Guy, it was so weird yesterday. I saw a guy, and he kept repeating the same thing over and over. I hate people with dementia. I told my mom to get a new mirror, but she won’t listen to me. It’s almost like I said it like 20 times every time I say it.

I can't believe the suicide hotline put my cousin on hold. They left him hanging.

Roses are red, I am Groot, Honey, where's my super suit?

Who wants to be my boyfriend, please?

"My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104."

A man died and went to heaven. Every time you cheat, you get a worse car.

The first man cheated 5 times; he got a Jeep. The second man cheated 3 times; he got a BMW. The third man never cheated; he got a Lamborghini.

The second man saw the third man sad. He said, "Why are you sad?" The third man said, "I saw my wife with a scooter."

I was at school when I remembered I forgot my necklace, then I screamed out, "Shit, I forgot Grandpa!"

All my 9/11 jokes crash and burn.

All my friends live in a forest. It's called Aokigahara.

Everyone else seems to have met my dad. I only have the mugshots.

My fucking balls hurt so god damn bad, oh my god!

My sister’s birthday is on 9/11. When she opened her presents, she jumped up with an explosion.

You look good now, but you’d look better hanging from my ceiling. ;)

All my 9/11 jokes seem to fly too low.

I was at work and then a little kid came up to me and she said, "What happened to all the parents?" She sounded so confused, so I told her, "It's only yours, kid, they left you on purpose." She cried. I felt bad for a second and thought, oh well, time to get back to my job at the orphanage.

Thank you so much for helping me get to 20 followers! I'm so happy, every time I look at my followers going up, it makes me so happy. I can't wait to keep posting other things on here! <3