My jokes

My last relationship ended because my ex-girlfriend accused me of being a rapist. I'm not upset. To be honest, I didn't like her anyway. She kept telling me I never listen, or something like that.

Boy: “My heart MELTS for you.”

Girl: “OMG, are you okay?!?!”

Boy: “Yeah, why?”

Girl: “Because if your heart is melting, then you are NOT okay.”

How are Xbox servers like hookers? First they take my money, and then they go down on me.

I hate my wife.

Why is my anus burning?

'Cause I sat on an open lighter, oh god, help!

Orphans around my area only watched Youtube Shorts.

I asked them and then realized they can't click the home button.

This is the account of music provider just let you I post for the enjoyment of myself, and to spread different kinds and types of music willingly. I do not respond for the soul reason of ✨people✨ and do not take offense to anything that I post. If you have and issues or just wanna talk contact me i'm only discord so that's all you getting (not being rude) ill put my discord in the comments.

I was riding my bike when I saw a man's head in the wheel. It was mine.

I accidentally sucked my own ball sack.

My grandpa said, "Your generation relies too much on technology." I said, "We will see about that," and I unplugged his life support.

I was in cooking class and my teacher said, "Does anyone know what a chopping board is similar to?"

Me and my friend just glanced at each other and burst out laughing.

Long story short, the teacher understood the joke, and now we are both in daily therapy. 😭💀

Should I kill the main character's best friends in my book? It's an autobiography.

Guess what my plans are for the weekend? Suing the NYCDOE for blocking (probably) WEBTOONS.com.

A donut is not empty inside, that was a hole in the middle. If I'm a donut, the hole used to be where I put my feeling and happiness, but people snatch it away from me.

Anyway, can someone put a hole in my physical body too? I kinda wanted to see people cry for me just like how people cry for Ace from One Piece.

It smells like something died in my room, oh yeah, it's my dignity, hope, and my feeling. Put in the corner of my room, they make a decent blanket to wipe my tears.

My dad went out for milk. It's been 15 years and I still have to eat my cereal dry.

My wife cheated on me with my brother.

She didn't have a sister, so I improvised, and now all I have to do is wait nine months for one to come.

I was in the mood for some dark meat, so I called my black friend.

My black friend turned off the lights and suddenly disappeared.

I saw a pretty girl walking outside. I asked for her number.

We met up and began to have sex. She told me to turn over, which was weird. I felt a stinging pain in my ass all of a sudden.