Music jokes

A blind man walks into a woman's bar and asks the person next to him if she would like to hear a blonde joke. The woman says, "Before you tell your joke, you should know the bartender is blonde and has a shotgun, the bouncer is blonde and has a baseball bat, the two playing music are blonde and have pistols. Do you still want to tell that joke, cowboy?" He thought for a second and said, "Not if I have to explain it five times."

What did the Queen Bee of Destiny's Child say?

"I'm so crazy in love..."

What do emos like to do when they're sad?

They play violin on their wrists.

What music scares balloons?

Pop music.

Why would the banana scream "ouch?"

Because it is getting peeled.

What is Osama Bin Laden's favorite song rn??

UNDAAAA THE SEAAAA - by the little mermaid.

What’s a downy's favorite song? Down Under.

Who is the man behind all lives matter?

Michael Jackson.

What did Mickey Mouse and Michael Jackson have in common?: (What *didn't* they have in common)

Same red shorts, theme park in their backyard, white glove, soft voices, loved children, they both were black with white faces.

What do you call an obnoxiously loud fog horn? A beginner saxophonist.

If a priest listens to sad music in his church, he really enjoys being deep in minor.

I am a God. Na, na, na, na, na, na. Yeah.

She's got makeup by the mirror in her bedroom, Thigh-high fishnets and some black boots, Nose pierced with the cigarette perfume, Half dead, but she still looks so cute. She is a monster in disguise, And she knows all the words to the trap songs, Takes pic's with a cherry-red lipstick, Says she only dates guys with a big..., mmm

What's the autistic kid's favorite song? Yours.

Why do emos like yo-yo's? Cos they get strangled by the string.

Stephen Hawking always wins musical chairs, as he’s always sitting down.

Good news, people! Michael Jackson is still alive. They found him hidden away in a goat pen with all the kids!

Bully: My mom says I'm not allowed to burn trash.

Me: (quiet)

Bully: HEY I'M TALKING TO YOU.

Me: Are you talking to yourself? Because I was listening to music until I heard you.

Stephen Hawking's least favorite song is "I'm Still Standing."

What place is Flo Rida from? Florida.

Me: U know the show called Imagine Dragons?

Friends: No, what is it?

Me: Imagine dragon this nuts across yo mouth.

James Last, the king of the LP bargain bin, died a Florida Man.