Mom jokes

Mom: Hey, there's IHOP.

Kid: You hop to.

Mommy, why is my name Brick???

Mom: When you were a little baby, a brick dropped on your head.

Mommy, why is my name Rose???

Mom: When you were a little baby, a rose petal dropped on your head.

Brick walks in, "Blagudnunag."

I was on a plane and my mom said, "It's just a little turbulence."

And I said, "Mom, we just got on the runway!"

Sike, I lied, your mom is a guy!

My mom said she would miss me if I committed suicide, so we made it double.

Lol, this joke may not be funny, but what do you call your mom fat and emo?

What's the difference between me and you?

I leave white stains in your mom's bed, and you leave white stains in my mom's bed!

Your mom's so small that she hang glided on a Dorito!

Tell your mom happy last night. 🍆 in my bed.

Your mom is so fat that Dora couldn't explore her.

What's the difference between you and your mom?

I slept with your mom.

If you're an orphan, it must be pretty hard taking "your mom" jokes.

I asked my mother about her mom.

She said she was in a better place. After that, I asked her where that place is. She didn't know, so I sent her to a better place.

What did the triangle say to the circle? Ur mom.

What’s the difference between my mom and the Twin Towers?

My mom got hit by two cars. The Twin Towers got hit by two planes.

Where was your mom last night? In the man club?

What's the difference between your mom and a mosquito?

Answer: The mosquito stops sucking if you slap hard enough.

What do you call your mom?

Basement bound.

Bully: My mom says I'm not allowed to burn trash.

Me: (quiet)

Bully: HEY I'M TALKING TO YOU.

Me: Are you talking to yourself? Because I was listening to music until I heard you.

Sad life goes, joke mom.