Family meeting jokes

So one time I was looking up the definition of "accident" because I was a little dumbo and didn’t know what it meant. Then my sister walks up behind me and points at the word and says, “That’s you!” (meaning that I was an accident).

A few minutes later, we had a big family meeting and my dad said to my sister, “Sweetie, you were an accident. We didn’t mean to make you, but we still love you with everything we’ve got.”

My sister never talked to me again and left the house. She was 17 when she left. Seriously, 17-year-olds just never mature, huh?

Do not tell an orphan family meeting; they wouldn't get it.

Me: *in a family meeting*

Mom: Ok guys...

Me in my mind: BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA

When meeting her parents doesn't require you to leave the house.

I hate family reunions.

I see too many of my ex's there.

My family is like a treasure.

You need a map and shovel to find them.

Hey, can't wait to meet you! So join the crippling depression family!!

It's sad how families can be torn apart from something as simple as wild dogs.