a favorite childhood memory was building sandcastles with my grandfather , that is until my mom took the urn away from me
I'll Never Forget My Grandfathers Last Words "STOP SHAKING THE LADDER YOU LITTLE CUNT!"
A daughter asked her mother, “Mom, how do you spell ‘scrotum’?”
Her mom replied, “Honey, you should have asked me last night—it was on the tip of my tongue.”
Your hairline goes so far back it remembers the big band
Why do orphans hate the color black? Because it reminds them of there dark history
Two girls have a sleepover.
Karen: Let's go to bed. Lauren:Fine, but it's early. *Karen wakes up and exits room" *Lauren hears noise* Mikey: Your so much better than my girlfriend Karen. Lauren: *laughs* Lauren: *remembers her boyfriend is Karen's brother Mikey*
In memory of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as various places is introducing the Jackson Dog. A 50 year old sausage between 9 year old bun
if u tell a girl there pretty they wont believe u if u tell them their ugly their never forget it....
elephants never forget.
What’s the best thing about Alzheimer’s? You can hide your own Easter Egg’s!!
I will always remeber my dads last words.... "15 dollars and ill jump."
i will never forget my girlfriends last words..."get off of me STOP"*slurp*...Dead
Grandpa: "Sonny, let me tell you something. There's only one damn thing in this whole world worse than Alzheimers." Boy: "What's that?" Grandpa: "What's what?"
All these jokes really hijacking my mind.
in can re;ate to this its always going through my mind
I went to see my grandfather in the hospital because I Wanted to get to know him better before he passed, maybe take a selfie with him. But when I got there my phone died so I unplugged a vacuum to plug in my phone, and it turns out he only knows Spanish so When he kept saying "Me desconectaste el soporte de mi vida." I thought he wanted water, but when I got back with the water he was asleep and now my phone was charged so I translated what he said. And it was "You unplugged my life support", that's when I called the doctor...
Good news is, I got one sick selfie!
I'll always remember my Dad's last words before he died on 9/11...
Allahu Akbar!
A man asked for poison and another man gave it to him. The first man took a sip and said, "hmmm this tastes like arsenic." He took a sip of another and said, "hmmm this tastes like cyanide. A very unpleasant taste that brings back memories."
Two boys are talking on the bus Boy 1: I feel like i'm forgetting something. Boy 2: hey did you hear about that school shooting last week? Boy 1: oh that's right
Me and my grandpa went on a road trip and he died that was the last thing we did together and I will never forget his last words “WAKE UP YOU DUMBASS”
"My grandmother used to tell us a joke. She’d say 'Knock knock,' we’d say 'Who’s there?.' Then she’d say 'I can’t remember'... and start to cry."
