Memory jokes

My husband wants to tell me about my childhood.

Ok, I can't access the panel without the password.

I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but it eventually came back to me.

Everyone else seems to have met my dad. I only have the mugshots.

Roses are red, violets are blue, When I take out the trash, I remember you.

John Cabot was the first to explore the Coast of Labrador. After he left, he realized that he had forgotten something and had to go back to get whatever it was. This made him the first Labrador Retriever.

I hope you remembered my name since you’ll be screaming it later.

What does my dad and the Twin Towers have in common? They used to be with us, now it's just a sensitive topic.

I will remember my biker buddy's last words: "Why did you cut in front of me?"

Fork pierces the flesh. Guided by hunger's demand, Savoury feast waits.

Tines dig deep within, Seeking the sustenance craved, A mealtime delight.

Belly grumbles loud, Yearning for nourishment's touch, Fork answers the call.

Food on the platter, Fork dances with anticipation, To satiate hunger's plea.

Digestion begins, Fork's journey now complete, Nourishing the soul.

Why does the fork go? To bring joy to empty hearts, Satiating needs.

In the stomach's depths, Fork finds purpose and solace, A culinary bond.

With each mealtime tale, The fork carves memories deep, In stomachs it rests.

I'll never forget my dad's last words before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, look how far I can kick this bucket!"

Lady: Will you fuck me?

Man: No, I don’t have a penis.

Lady pulls down man's pants and looks in them. "Yes, you do!" she says.

Man: Oh, I forgot it was there.

I find it best to screw people with memory loss. I mean, what's my grandma gonna do? Describe me to the cops?

My Dad said he got me from the shops, and I remembered what Grandpa said about him.

I still can’t forget that tiny little dead fish in my blue lunchbox.

So I was digging in the garden and I found some treasure. I was gonna tell my wife when I remembered why I was digging in the garden.

A computer usually has a HARD drive. LESSON. No wonder they remember things.

"Knock knock."

"Who's there?"

"Steve!"

"Steve who?"

Steve cries, aware that his grandmother's Alzheimer's has reached a point where she can no longer remember him.

Yo mama so fat, when she took a picture of herself, her phone ran out of storage.

Why do women wear panties with flowers on them?

In loving memory of all the faces that have been buried there.

I will never forget my Grandpa's last words: "What are you doing with that rope and saw?"