Means

Means jokes

Kurt Cobain

  • Kurt Cobain didn't mean to kill himself. He was just so high he thought the shotgun was a bong.

    His lyrics are so ironic but so true. "I'm not coming back". "I swear I don't have a gun."

  • 2
  • Porn

  • A: Why are you so sad?

    B: I was watching porn, and all of a sudden my wife opened the door.

    A: Ok, I see, but is that really such a big deal?

    B: I mean, she opened the door in the movie.

  • 2
  • Orphan

  • I never do dark jokes, but when I feel like it, I prefer orphan jokes, 'cause they're the safest option. I mean, what are they gonna do, call their parents?

  • 1
  • Fly

  • If a fly loses its wings, is it now a walk? Wait a minute, I found out a mind blower. So the 🌎 is the 3rd planet from the sun, doesn't that mean all countries are called the 3rd country of 🌎? If I get 10 likes, I'll do one mind-blowing fact daily.

  • 3
  • Trump

  • "(live comedy club) Foul Mouthed Trump Hating Comic:

    ......"Hey how 'bout that Donald Trump chump, what the fuck up with that dude, man? Geeeezus, he got some kuh-razy ass shit spewing endlessly out that pie-hole, 24/8!" (< leap week, muthafukas!) . . . "I mean, even his last name rhymes with shit that's synonymous for being fucked up, for instance"....

    STUMP: TEENY DICK

    BUMP: TINY TIT

    GUMP: DIMWITTED MOVIE IDIOT GUY

    MUMP: A FUCKED UP CHILDREN'S DISEASE

    LUMP: IF IT'S MALIGNANT, YOU'RE KINDA FUCKED

    UMP: OFTEN MAKES TERRIBLE CALLS

    RUMP: AN ASS

    DUMP: A PILE OF SHIT THAT CAME OUT OF AN ASS

    HUMP: SOMETHING DADDY DID TO HIM DAILY THROUGHOUT CHILDHOOD

    PUMP: SEE "HUMP" . . . and last, but definitely not least --

    JUMP: JUMP INTO A DEEP HOLE MOTHER FUCKER, AND GO TO HELL!!

    .... "Well that's about it for me as my explosive diarrhea is about ready to take a turn for the worse!! ......(splort!, plop!)....... OOOOPS!! ..... sniff, sniff........ Ewww!" (audience roars) "Fuhhhhk!". . . I better go, 'cause I just went!! ..... Ha! ha! ha!" . . . "Thank You Lazies and Gerbilmen! Good Night!!" ............

    (endless laughter, guffaws, cheers, jeers, queers, beers, pants pee-ing, beaters beating, pepper sprayin', guns poppin')

    "OH LORDY!!... HELL HATH FINALLY COMETH, AND ARMAGETTIN' THE FUCK OUTTA HEEE!!"

    (quick curtain call, and off to waiting taxi.........with the windows down) .......Amen."

  • 9
  • System

  • Right, the bit as the bottom... i mean, look i keep myslef open on systems to rule empires and shit should i ever need to be it.

    A drawing of a hydra with multiple heads. The text on the image reads: "Hydra System. The Hydra is simple, every 2 represents a 1. When a head is cut, its twin must lead the next 2 novice heads. This means when every weak point is exercised the weak spot is a new offense. The perfect system."
  • 0
  • Community talk

  • She was more like a beauty queen From a movie scene I said, "Don't mind, but what do you mean I am the one Who will dance on the floor in the round?" She said I am the one Who will dance on the floor in the round She told me her name was Billie Jean As she caused a scene Then every head turned with eyes that dreamed of being the one Who will dance on the floor in the round People always told me, "Be careful of what y… Read more

  • YOU CALLED HER A HOE BECAUSE SHE SAID NO, BUDDY YOUR LETTING ALL YOUR FRAGILE MASCULINITY SHOW I MEAN- DUDE “oh my” SHES JUST NOT INTO YOU!