Means jokes

Why is the sun so mean? Because it keeps ROASTING everyone!

Are you adopted?

No.

I mean, who would want you?

Stephen Hawking walks, I mean rolls into a bar.

When I said I wanted vegetable stew, I didn’t mean boil Stephen Hawking!

There are 2 dads and 2 sons. They all caught a fish.

Why did they only come home with 3 fish?

(Answer)

There were a grand-dad, dad, and son.

If you don't get it, then it means grand father is the dad to the dad (1 dad). Dad is the dad for the son and a son for the grandfather. Get it?

Brings a whole new meaning to brotherly love.

There were two friends talking one day. Tim tells John, "I think I'm gay."

John says to Tim, "What do you mean?"

Tim says, "When I grow up, I want to dress like a woman and sing karaoke in a bar and call myself (Gillette the best a man can get)!"

John says to Tim, "I think you're right, and thanks for reminding me I need to buy razors."

Qassem Soleimani is so popular today.

I mean, he just blew up overnight!

Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?

Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.

Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!

Stacy: lol

What does it mean when there is a man in your bed, gasping for breath and saying your name?

It just means that you didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

Guys, should I do it? You know what I mean.

Nah, I'm Hawaiian but I'm also Japanese. So does that mean I bombed my own harbor?

Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? Idaho, Alaska?

What it actually means: Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? I don’t know. I’ll ask her.

P.S. My dad is a history teacher and he told me to put this in here.

A guy goes into the gas station and says, "I need a box of rubbers with pesticide."

The cashier said, "Pesticide? Don't you mean spermicide?"

The guy says, "No! My old lady has had a bug up her ass all week, and I am going to kill it."

My parents created a joke 11 years ago and people are still laughing at it, but I know it's not me because jokes have meaning.

What's the difference between me and a corpse? I mean, I'm not dead... yet, right?

I hate school. I mean, why can't you pull out a 12 gauge and shoot everyone, including the teachers?! This generation is too soft, man.

"Hey, what does IDK mean?"

"I don't know."

"Okay, then I am going to ask someone else."

Me: How do you celebrate Christmas?

Orphan: I don't know what you mean.

Me: There is no one to give a present.

If I fantasize about fucking a UCP Cabinet Minister,

Does that mean I'm sexually Conservative?