ME jokes
The name is Doe, Dilbert Doe. You can call me Dil.
Mrs. Kadie, I just heard about a FGTEEV video about vegan nuggets.
Duddy: Sup FGTEEVERS, me and James Marsden just got some Chick-fil-A.
Viewers: Got ya again Mrs. Kadie.
Mrs. Kadie: Vincent and James, I am going to push you off your roof.
Duddy and James: AHHHHHHH!
One time, a man got mad at me because I was hitting on his girlfriend. Like come on, man, it was only a couple of bruises!
Fuck people who are bigger than me physically, emotionally, mentally, economically, and socially.
Me: Where's your mom?
Kid: [cries]
Me: [leaving from the adoption center]
Memes
My girlfriend broke up with me today. Her mom had to take her to daycare. 😢😢😢
Ryan, I laid out more jokes than you have crying about me!
Me people call me emo.
Older cousin: Why?
Because I always have my hood up and wear black cloths and wear black cross earrings.
Yesterday a woman stabbed me, so I stabbed her back. Then I realized she was the vaccine woman.
My girlfriend’s dog died, so I bought her another, identical one.
She just screamed at me and said: “What am I meant to do with two dead dogs?!?”
When I died, my friend said he'd cover me.
My mom once told me to spread positivity across the world, so I did.
I spread Covid across the globe because I tested positive :D
My gf told me I have to be more in touch with my feminine side, so I crashed the car.
My parents used to make me and my siblings apologize to the ground when we stomped.
If I had done "it," I would have gotten SO many apologies.
Bully: How is your girlfriend?
Me: I don't have one!
Bully: I know!
Me: How are your parents?
*Walks out of orphanage*
Listen, if my mom sees me on Roblox at 3 a.m., she said she would bang my head against the keyboardndfndfnnckvnksdvknkdsfnvbfw.
"Bully," omg, that girl is so ugly.
"Me," Wait, what...ever.
What do you call a failure in another language?
Me.
What's the best way to tell your friend you hate them? Option 1: Kill them. Option 2: Walk away. Option 3: Kill each other.
Me: Why can't I just kms and leave them the pain?
My mom is telling me to get off Friday Night Funkin' or she will slam my head against the keyboard: weherhrqqkh[qokqho[krq3[t4i2-4q43q343q44334q43.