Make jokes

I am starting a business where I help people count. It is called making the little things count.

Want to know something? Jason and Michael Myers had to watch their family while they have to live forever. That's why they kill; they're trying to make people experience what they did.

I told my sister to make a noise and hear what she said... "Cuckoo coo chew." #Owl🦉

Being a mom to a teenager will make you understand why some animals eat their young.

Do you wanna eat makeup, 'cause you're not pretty on the inside?

How do you make an ass laugh?

Crack a CHEEKY JOKE.

Why should you never trust atoms?

Because they make up everything!

What's the difference between someone with dystonia and someone with misophonia?

One makes the annoying noises, while the other hates the annoying noises.

I don't know what makes BlessedBrian so STUPID, but it REALLY works!

A Snorlax was in a bar, and he was drinking beer when an Eevee and a Rockruff hopped onto a stool. The Eevee ordered an oran berry special for the both of them.

Snorlax: Y'all make the perfect couple.

Random Zorua: Dragonite, is it just an illusion, or is that Snorlax fatter than this region?

It's fucked up how people make these jokes, and when orphans read them, it makes them feel worse about themselves. I should know, I'm an orphan.

Mom: Don't forget to unload the dishwasher.

Mom: Did you finish your homework?

Mom: We are going to your grandmother's house for Thanksgiving.

Mom: Dad and I talked. We are getting a new car next month.

Son: You are?? Oh my gosh, thank you!

Mom: No, I was just making sure you were getting my texts.

Son: That was cruel!

"Rajesh get on bus, so many people, squeeze here squeeze there. He daydream about naughty stuff, like coffee spill but not coffee. Bus move, stop, he press close to pretty lady, she smell nice. Rajesh think how funny if something else spill, make whole bus ride wild." He laugh to self, bus ride never boring now!

CEO Intrepid entrepreneur born in 1964, Jeffrey, Jeffrey Bezos.

Repeat, come on Jeffrey, you can do it, pave the way, put your back into it, tell us why, show us how, look at where you came from, look at you now.

Zuckerberg and Gates and Musk, they're the anchors, can make and sick it up there with drink their blood, come on Jeff get it! Dododoododododod

I would make a joke about short people, but they probably couldn't hear it.

Boy, your forehead so big, I can make a launchpad on that shit!

If two people who have the clap sleep together, did they make an applause?

Just watched an upsetting video. Please retweet. #Stop The Make-A-Wish Foundation.

If something doesn't make sense to an Eskimo... is it counterINUITive?

Me: *finds out my dad's an orphan*

No one:

Literally no one:

Me: Time to make his life hell.😈