Make jokes
Nothing makes a guy happier than when his girlfriend says, “Go and lock the door first...”
Why [doesn't] Hollywood make a good movie about holocausts?
Because it's so hard to skin Jewish characters.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You look like Shrek, And you make me peck.
I should probably stop making jokes about 9/11.
My dad died to it, he was a great pilot.
What happens when you fail to be an emo? You don't make the cut.
I don't usually make 9/11 jokes. They always go down in flames.
Dude, people gotta stop letting 9/11 jokes fly around like bro, you're gonna make my brain explode!
I would make a joke, but it won't be as explosive as the others.
I was the person that flew into the Twin Towers. I have two friends that are both twins, and whenever they speak, I tell them to shut up because if they don't, I'll make myself explode in them.
Why can't orphans be in charge of making web pages?
Because they can't add a home page.
Now why an office supply keep rape videos, to make sure it was on tape?
Welcome to Joe's pizza, you make 'em, we bake 'em.
Make America Great Britain again!
A hobo couple is making out under a bridge.
The girlfriend goes: - Johnny, why is your dick so soft? - Flip me over, I’m trying to shit!
"I can lose 10 ugly pounds anytime I want -- I'll just cut off my head!"
Do you use humor to make light of your emotional eating and your weight? Make jokes about overeating and being fat as a way of getting along with other people? I was a Grand Champion at it.
What makes Stephen Hawking and your dumped girlfriend similar?
They can't stand up for themselves.
TELL ME YOU'VE DONE THIS WITHOUT TELLING ME YOU'VE DONE THIS.!!! So, we all know when y'all were in school, y'all would fart, but y'all would try to make it silent, but for me, that one day I farted loud, and everyone could hear. Everyone got to blame the annoying kid.
What do you call 2 emos making out in a science classroom?
My Chemical Romance.
When God had to take a shit from making a good wife, you pasted between his ass cheeks...
Why did Dan the orphan go to the orphanage?
Because he was! I couldn't make the homepage website!!