Made

Made jokes

Wife

    • Dschoha's wife was accustomed to go out at night to meet her lover, which caused the neighbors to tease Dschoha. Thus, one night he stayed awake until she left, then locked the door and sat down just inside.

    Upon returning, she found the door locked. She asked him to have mercy on her and to open the door, but he just scolded her.

    Having given up hope for a good outcome, she said to him, "If you don't open the door for me, I'll jump into the well."

    Then she picked up a large stone and threw it into the well. Filled with regret, he ran outside to see what had happened. His wife immediately slipped into the house and locked the door.

    He made every effort to convince her to let him come inside, but she scolded him incessantly, saying, "This is what you get for staying out all night with your drunken friends!" And thus she succeeded in shaming him in the presence of all their neighbors.

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    • Friend

    • My friend Josh made a joke about Liam's hairline, even though his ears are so big and his face looks like a monkey... if they were white.

  • 1
    • Made memes

    Weed

    • Two to the one from the one to the three, I like good pussy and I like good trees, Smoke so much weed you wouldn't believe, And I get more ass than a toilet seat.

    Three to the one from the one to the three, I met a bad bitch last night in the D, Let me tell you how I made her leave with me, Conversation and Hennessey.

    I've been to the motherfuckin' mountain top, Heard motherfuckers talk, seen and dropped, If I ain't got a weapon I'ma pick up a rock, And when I bust yo ass I'ma continue to rock.

    Getcha ass of the wall with your two left feet, It's real easy just follow the beat, Don't let that fine girl pass you by, Look real close 'cause strobe lights blind.

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    • Sister

    • My sister said download "Among Us" on my iPad, so I did. Then she taught me to play. Then she told me a code and told me where to put it, and I typed in the code.

    Then she was the imposter, and I was a crewmate, so I was sticking with her, and she killed me when we made it to the medbay.

    Sex

    • Last night I had sex and she said, "Stop talking about s***, OMG!" and I made her scream so loud she said, "Her balls hurt!"

    Teacher

    • The teacher made us present a slideshow to introduce ourselves.

    Mine is bright and colorful with music. It was so good that a kid started dancing!

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    • Lego

    • What did they do with his body when he died?

    They made him into Lego so kids can play with him for once.

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    • Rape

    • Jack and Jill went up to an abandoned house.

    Jack drank too much and unzipped his fly. Jack said, "You know you wanna." Jill said, "No." So Jack locked both of them in the house and put a gag in Jill's mouth, tied her to a bed. He ripped off her dress and underwear. He took off his pants and his underwear too, then put on a condom. He then put a pill in her mouth and made her swallow. One minute later she was asleep. He took off her gag and mounted himself on her, then stuck his "candystick" in her mouth, next her fanny. Then his condom broke, but he was too drunk to notice. Nine months later a baby's born and Jack's in jail as the father.

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    • Character

    • This is a joke about Ms. Ploopatoink, a made-up character who is a pink fluffy pony who loves toilet paper.

    Why is Ms. Ploopatoink like a toilet plunger?

    They both jump in the toilet!

  • 2

    • Interest

    • What made you suddenly lose interest in someone you were pursuing?

    When I found out they liked me back. Not interested in someone with poor judgment.

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    • Mistake

    • Guy spills milk on me. I say, "It's okay, we all make mistakes sometimes, but apparently your mom made a big one."

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