Love jokes
I could never fall out of a boat because I've already fallen for you.
What does a depressed kid who loves geometry use to kill themself?
A hypoteNUSE!
Why does your grandma like gardening so much?
Because she loves getting dirty down on her knees.
A piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.
"Oh, Bunsen, my flame," the sodium swooned. "I melt whenever I see you!"
The Bunsen burner replied, "Calm down. It's just a phase you're going through."
What song do supportive parents of a closeted child love?
“The Son Will Come Out Tomorrow.”
Why do rappers love the gym?
'Cause they're all about them heavy bars.
What did Cinderella say to Prince Charming?
"Want to see if it fits?"
My girlfriend's sister told me to write her a poem. This is what I came up with:
roses are red, violets are blue, if you ever feel alone, I'm always watching you.
My girlfriend really wants me to get her pregnant so she would have a father figure in her life for once.
When you donate a kidney, you are a total hero, everyone loves you.
When you donate five kidneys though, people start yelling, the police gets called--sheesh!
Yesterday I made food using oil--olive oil.
(I love oil!)
Marry or don't marry, you will regret both!
Girl: I’m so in love with you!
Boy: Me too. I think you’re abcdefghijk: aesthetic, beautiful, cool, determined, elegant, famous, hot.
Girl: What’s the ijk?
Boy: I’m just kidding.
🎵Penaldo Thrills🎵
C’mon c’mon turn the VAR on.
It's Penalty time and it won't be long.
Gotta dive and cry some more.
It's Penalty time and it won't be long.
‘Til I Hit the floor and dive alot.
Cry some more and dive alot. That all I need, because I got u my love, Penalty.
Why do orphans love Home Alone?
They like to see a familiar picture.
What's worse, being loved or hated? 'Cause when you're loved you could be left alone or be betrayed, but when you're hated no one's there to leave you. What do you think?
I asked the orphan why he was crying. He didn't really say anything.
Then I asked where are your parents? He cried more. I love working at the orphanage.
What is cold and alone?
An orphan's parent.
Why is an orphan bad at tennis?
'Cause he couldn't get any love.
My dad died in 9/11. At least he did what he loves best: flying planes.