Love jokes

I named my dog Chicken.

I love eating chicken.

Gwen, I thought you would be with me if Prince broke up with you... :((((((

Quin loves Robin. All he says is "Robin." This isn't a joke; Quin's gay.

Are you Jeffrey Dahmer? Because I'd love you to eat me.

Roses are red, violets are blue, When I see you, I play with my poo.

Girl: Dad, where are you?

Dad: I went to go get milk.

Girl: But we have milk.

Dad: I know, I just don't love you.

Roses are red, lemons are sour.

Open your legs and give me an hour.

Roses are red, balls are round, skirts are up, panties are down, belly to belly, skin to skin, when it's stiff, stick it in.

All these oranges, but you're still the one for me.

What does Justin Bieber and a rabbit have in common?

They're both adorably cute and everyone loves them except for Justin Bieber.

I love the letters of the alphabet.

I love the way the Earth rotates.

It really makes my day!

Man and woman are having a discussion. The woman looks into the man's eyes and says, "Honey, you know how I like it when you walk up and stick it in . . . "

". . . but I love it when Bob walks up and sticks it in!"

Divorce is scheduled for next month.

Papyrus: I hate you, Frisk.

Frisk: This is why Mettaton doesn't fucking love you.

Sans: Kid, I will kill you.

Papyrus: (Remembers something) That's why you don't have a lover, you lonely giraffe!

My wife said, "Why oh why have you ordered carpet, our house is lovely?"

Thankfully the carpet was put to good use in the end, no more stupid comments coming from a rolled up Emily in the bottom of the ocean!

Do you know why orphans can't get married? Because they will never get their parents' blessing.

Brings a whole new meaning to brotherly love.

Me: *sprays some perfume on myself*

Friend: Omg, that smells so good! You’re so aromatic, how do you not have a bf yet?

Me: ... I’m aromantic and aromatic. I do not desire romantic relationships with others although I do enjoy carrying lovely scents with me.

What is a kid who loves school?

A smart kid.

What is the difference between chocolate and sex?

I would rather eat the chocolate first and then make love.