Love

Love jokes

There was a girl called Millie, and she had sexy blond hair, and she wanted to chase me, but I told her she had to catch me first if she loves me.

A male unexploded landmine was in love with a female unexploded landmine, and he said to her...

"Hey, baby, we should bang sometime!"

Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered, "Y?"

My boss said she would've loved to meet Bill Cosby as a child. I don't get why I'm getting arrested. I was just making sure his dream came true.

Me: “You guys wanna know a cool fact?”

Friend 1: “Yeah.”

Friend 2: “Yea.”

Me: “Japan is RIGHT that way. If we swim all night...we’ll be able to get to Japan.”

Friend 3: “I love anime.”

Friend 1 & 2: “Nononononononononono!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Me: *Laughs at Friend 3*

Kid 1: I like you! Do you like me?

Kid 2: No. You never asked if I love you!

Kid 1: Aw, do you love me?

Kid 2: No!

Girlfriend: "Would you still love me if I was a figment of your imagination?"

My schizophrenic ass: Of course I would.

There's a new Michael Jackson biopic in the works. There is a possibility that we will know who his love interest was.

What we know so far: Billie Jean is not his lover, and that kid [seen with him] is not his son. We also know that Michael Jackson said that sharing his bed with little boys is "healing" and an act of "sharing the love," so take that as you will.