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Orphan

Why do kids like to pick on orphans?

Because they can't call their parents.

Christmas

I like Christmas.

It’s the holiday where an old man breaks into people’s homes so he can give them toys! :) yaaaaay 😁

Life

I heard life was a gift. Well, I hope they kept the receipt, because I'd like a mother-fucking refund!

Bird

Bro, yesterday this bird made the weirdest chirp. It sounded something like this:

"Error code 6, 4, 4, 2, sound: bird call, failed to play, government drone 0, 7, 7, 5 requires maintenance."

Anyone know what bird that is?

Memes

Split

We split because she would always say I never listen, or something like that.

Penis

What did the hamster say to the penis? "Ha, you look just like me!"

Mask

Do you ever wonder why Michael from Halloween likes his mask so much? It's because he ad-Myers it.

Cut

I went to an emo kid who just got a haircut, and instead of saying, "Like your cut, G," I slapped his arm and said, "I like your cuts, G."

Orphan

Why do Orphans like school?

Because they don't have a home to go back to afterwards.

Oreo

Why did the emo kid like the all black Oreos?

'Cause they're dark.

Generation

Gen Z is most likely going to be the last generation who felt the pain of getting up early to catch their favorite show.

Twin Towers

It was a blast to visit the Twin Towers on 9/11 at exactly 8:46 a.m. It was the bomb... like, literally!

Calendar

I'm afraid for my gay calendar. Its days are numbered!

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Body

Bill really said "your body, my choice," like, my man, it's your body, MY choice.