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Bro, yesterday this bird made the weirdest chirp. It sounded something like this:
"Error code 6, 4, 4, 2, sound: bird call, failed to play, government drone 0, 7, 7, 5 requires maintenance."
Anyone know what bird that is?
We split because she would always say I never listen, or something like that.
What did the hamster say to the penis? "Ha, you look just like me!"
Dark humor is like life:
Not everyone gets it.
Do you ever wonder why Michael from Halloween likes his mask so much? It's because he ad-Myers it.
What do eggs like doing on stage?
Cracking jokes!
I went to an emo kid who just got a haircut, and instead of saying, "Like your cut, G," I slapped his arm and said, "I like your cuts, G."
Why do Orphans like school?
Because they don't have a home to go back to afterwards.
What type of cartoon do spiders like to watch the most?
Web Cartoons!
What kind of udder likes McDonald's?
Udderly unhealthy.
Why did the emo kid like the all black Oreos?
'Cause they're dark.
Gen Z is most likely going to be the last generation who felt the pain of getting up early to catch their favorite show.
It was a blast to visit the Twin Towers on 9/11 at exactly 8:46 a.m. It was the bomb... like, literally!
I'm afraid for my gay calendar. Its days are numbered!
Leave a like if you LOL at this joke!
Bill really said "your body, my choice," like, my man, it's your body, MY choice.
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James Bond: Vodka martini.
Bartender: Shaken, not stirred.
James Bond: Do I look like I give a damn?
I found this game, it's like flappy bird: https://terrorist.group/
Why don’t I like shafting?
It feels squishy.
What do Emos say to each other?
"I like your cuts, G."