Life jokes

I saw a little boy sitting on a curb wearing rags.

I said: "Aww, are you an orphan?"

And he responded with "Yeah. What gave me away?"

And I said: "Your parents."

Putin be like CSGO is much harder in real life!

You know they're lying when they say, "My mom's picking me up."

Chalie has an eating disorder, and he is shorter, so is his life, but he will never get a wife. He's a gay motherfucker who wants to be hit by a trucker?

Why do risky people have cats?

So they have 10 lives with them.

I was spending my holiday in Paris with my gf. As we were walking near the city, a meteor hit and killed my gf.

Forensics did an autopsy on the corpse and concluded that someone missed a pen and hit my gf from the PSG training ground. SHAME ON YOU PESSI FOR RUINING MY LIFE! 🤬😡

Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.

When you think of the word "simp," you think of a girl. "Girl" stands for ghosts in real life. Another word for simp is "ding dong." Put them together, and you get ghosts in real life with ding dongs.

What animal has more lives than a cat?

A frog. It croaks every night.

Friend: If you could get rid of any one person in your life, who would it be?

Me: Me.

Friend: *does nothing*

(x_x)

I forgot that I don't have friends.

Hi, oooo was the day I was a kid. I was going home to school today after dinner!

Why do my kids die?

Stinky Oussy :D

What did the fish say to the other fish?

"I want my life to be H2O-ver!"

What day should you drink water?

Thursday, Thirstday!

Your life, that's all.

I went to the store, and yeah...

Fun fact: If you're an orphan, you probably don't know your parents.

I was born yesterday, and I walked down memory lane. I fell over the edge!

Life is a bitch, and people make it worse.

This thing that I'm in ("am") is a forsaken curse (beta).

Why does this exist?