Legality jokes
What makes suicide illegal? Getting caught.
Legally Blonde.
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all in the 9th grade. Which one is the sexiest?
The blonde, because she’s the only one who’s 18.
What do Colorado and Saudi Arabia have in common?
It's legal to get stoned.
If you ever get bored, just punch an orphan in the face. What's he going to do? Tell his parents?
I'm 34 and I went on a date with my 19 year old girlfriend. I got heckled with "you're a paedophile!" and "you sick F...!" Completely ruined our 10th anniversary!
I asked someone why they were crying. They told me that they had to abort their twins.
Then someone yelled "DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE!"
Hi, everyone. Serious question. Would it be illegal to decapitate a worm? Asking for a friend, he's so worried we're going to jail. I'm not. I'm fine. Please reply fast.
If being sexy was a crime, you can call me......... a law-abiding citizen.
Remember that 18 year old girl I set you up with?
Why not?
Too old.
My friend David lost his ID.
Now he is just Dav.
I raped your mom. I flipped her upside down and called the position "wow."
Was threatened with legal action off my postman this morning!! I was stood havin a smoke when he asked if my dog bites, I said no. Halfway down my path the dog jumped up and bit him on his testicles!! Screaming out in pain he Said I was a lying bitch cos I told him my dog didnt bite!! Told him mine doesnt!! that wasnt my dog!!!
What is the similar thing between alcohol and anal sex?
They are not for kids.
It is now legal to bully an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Two businessmen bought the Milwaukee Bucks for $500 million. They are very excited about their transaction, for this is the only legal way to own black people.
Roses are red, potato chips are savory...
The United States prison system is legalized slavery.
What’s the best thing about an 18-year-old girl in the shower?
Slicker hair back she looks 15.
Him: *slowly drives past elementary school while looking at kids*
Her: Why are you staring at those kids? *jokingly* Are you like a pedophile or something?
Him: ... At least you know why I love calling you "baby" now~
What is the best thing about an 18-year-old girl in the shower?
Slick her hair, she looks 15.