Law jokes
Do you know why I hate pedophiles?
They are fucking immature kids!
I saw a person raping a woman in an alleyway. I decided to help...she doesn't stand a chance between us.
If a pregnant emo kills herself, is it murder-suicide?
I found Jeffrey Epstein’s diary the other day.
The last entry was about 12 years old.
"Officer, I drop kicked that child in self-defense." -Techno
Where did Jeffrey Epstein go to college?
Bring them young.
A: What did the lawyer say to the amputee?
Q: You haven't got a leg to stand on.
What is the most common crime in Asia?
Identity fraud.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a good body these days?
I think Jeffrey Dahmer had the right idea, just put it in the freezer.
Don’t be racist. Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.
What is a necrophiliac's safe word?
"I'm alive!"
Tons of people committed suicide on 9/11 by destroying government property.
Not to mention and by plane.
What did Bill Cosby say on the second date?
"Hi, nice to meet you."
What do you do to a deaf girl after you’re done fucking her?
Break her fingers so she can’t tell anyone.
Did you hear about the guy who was arrested for stealing luggage? Unfortunately, he lost his case.
Someone complimented my parking today! They left a sweet note on my windshield that said, “Parking fine.”
Why did the bee get into trouble?
Because he wasn't beehiving very well!
You're so trash that when I dropped you off, I got a ticket for littering.
A man walks into a bar... Oww!
I recently got kicked out of a casino because I apparently misunderstood what the craps table was for.