Law jokes
What is one good thing about pedophiles?
They drive slow in the school zone.
What's the difference between a prisoner and an orphan?
One is loved.
Justice for all!
A man shot into a crowd at the train station and didn't hit one person. When the police asked why he missed, someone said, "'Cause he gay."
He couldn't shoot straight.
A man hits a woman with his car. Whose fault was it?
The man, why was he driving in the kitchen?
So, I'm sitting here smacking on some cheese ball BBQ my titties, and then I felt a shoe get shoved all the way up my ass. I cried, then turned around and said, "MOTHERFUCKING COCK SUCK FUCKIN GAY ASS HOE SHOVIN SHOE’S UP MY ASS SON OF A BITCH!" Then turned around, punched, and got smacked in the face. Went in for another punch, got smacked in the face, then people staring at me. I said, "WTF r u starin at," I punched as hard as I can, then got knocked out. I though this this isnt over motherfucker imma find u and kill u next thing i new i was in the hospital they told me why tf were u fighting a stops sign? I said what u were fighting a motherfuckering stop sign i sad bitchi aint crazing yo head a stop sign son of a bitch fuck my pussy u must be high! hai es a bitch muhfuhcka
What’s worse than finger banging your sister?
Finding your dad’s wedding ring.
Roses are red, violets are blue, don't let your kids next to Prince Andrew.
Who needs dating apps when you have family reunions?
What do a turtle and a pedophile have in common?
They both try to get there before the hair does.
The hardest part of picking up a hitch hiker is tying them up.
A drunk guy runs into a bar... He bangs his head and falls down, why?
Because he is in a prison cell.
Why did Sally cross the road?
She didn’t wear her seatbelt.
What's young, red, and has hot PTSD?
Prince Andrew's victims.
I was gonna tell a joke about a dead fetus, but I decided to abort it.
I was listening to my children praying, and my youngest that can speak said to me: "Mama, why is Gramma dead?"
I smiled and told her, "Well, less than 10 years ago when I was 5, your age, my Momma took me into the basement with some hot rando during a party. And 9 months later Shinana was born. One Pedo after another and your 4 siblings were born. The Pedo I met last night told me, 'If your mother's the one making you do this, do what you do best.' I listened and the next day she didn't leave her bed breathing. When the Pedo found out he left me and your soon to be brother."
She replies with, "Make his child support expensive!" Now he has to pay me 2,000 U.S. dollars every month, like the other ones that ran away.
Cop: "I'm arresting you for downloading the entire Wikipedia."
Man: "Wait! I can explain everything!"
Y'all really need to stop hating on pedos!! At least they drive slow in school zones! God.
I have the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban at the New York Zoo.
What do you call the only Trump Supporter to follow his orders to obstruct justice?
Answer: Attorney General William Barr!