Law jokes

1, 2, I have a gun.

3, 4, I am in a school.

5, 6, Everyone on the ground!

My friend, Jackson Huge-T, got raped by Huge-D's.

Digga D, I'm a well known bandit, bandit. Had a new mash, just landed. Jheez, cop it, chop it, sand it, hand it. The verbal ting I can't stand it. Wife and two, got tanned when I banged it. Mad ting. Got a conspiracy case in the silliest Place, they're saying that I planned it, damn it. Back on a Feltham landing. You ain't been in the hood like Robin. I ride in hoods tryna leave man red (Crud). The sweets are goldy, yola drops and lots of dred (Maud). No porkies, pepper them pigeons, they chase this ped. Gyal tryna give man noddy, She ain't got balls in her tongue that's dead.

Why did orphans want to commit a crime?

Because they wanted to see what it feels like to be wanted.

If a man kills a kid, it's called Murder.

If a woman kills a kid, it's called Reproductive Rights.

Woman one: "I got so mad at my GPS today that I told it to go to hell!"

Woman two: "Did that work?"

Woman one: "Well, it took me to my in-laws’ house."

Here in IHOP, we serve pancakes, not pie cakes. If so, we can always bring in a chart that will power the customer. His smile will remain at its current form, and police surely resisted when I said the word "surely."

You can't put an orphan on house arrest if there isn't a house to arrest them to.

Why does the Please Touch Museum sound like "police touch museum?"

Because they gotta watch out for the pedos.

I accidentally hit an orphan with my car, but I was not worried because he couldn’t tell his parents.

I watched an episode of Law & Order Special Victims Unit. It turns out it's about rape. I thought it was going to be about crimes on a short bus or something.

Why can't Michael Jackson play baseball?

He made a hit and run!

What kind of file turns a 5mm hole into a 3cm hole?

A pedo-file.

What does a pedophile call an orphanage?

A supermarket.

What is the reason for why women never look to the right?

Because they don't have any rights.

If you kill a killer, the same amount of killers in the room stays the same.

Why are half the orphans missing? Because I took them, of course! :]

What do you call it when you get away with masturbating in the shower?

You got off clean.

What do a turtle and a pedophile have in common?

They both try to get there before the hair does.

What’s the difference between my sister-in-law and a driveway?

I pull out of the driveway.