The teacher was terrified to hear Little Johnny swear.
“I never want you to use language like that again. Where on earth did you pick it up?”
“From my father,” said Johnny.
“Well, he should be ashamed of himself. And it’s no reason for you to talk like that. You don’t even know what it means.”
“I do,” said Johnny. “It means the car won’t start.”
Little Johnny was overheard by his mother reciting his homework, “Two plus two, the son of a b*tch is four; four plus four, the son of a b*tch is eight; eight plus eight, the son of a b*tch...;” “Johnny!” shouted his mother. “Stop swearing!” “But mom!” Little Johnny protested, “That’s what the teacher taught us! And she said we should recite it till we learned it!”
The next day his mother went to the teacher to complain. “No, no,” said the teacher, terrified. “That’s not what I taught them. They’re supposed to say: ‘Two plus two, the sum of which is four.’”
If you're American when you go in the bathroom and you're American when you come out, what are you in the bathroom?
European.
How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."
My friend entered a pun contest. He entered ten, figuring at least one of them would win, but no pun in ten did.
Say "invented" without the first "n".
Why did the 2 4s skip lunch? They already 8! Jahshshs.
And how did the pirate know that she saw land? She was shore of it! If u get it leave a like. Hahahahaha and which thing was heavier, a feather or steal? It's they way the same amount 🤣 😂 😅 😆 🙃 😄 🤣 😂 😅 😆 🙃 😄 🤣 😂 😅 😆 Lol like
What is a gay person’s favorite book?
The dictionary.
What do you call a Spanish toilet?
Elton John.
Do midgets still start their childhood stories off with, "When I was little"?
What language do billboards speak?
Sign language.
What do you call 2 wings and a halo?
A Chinese phone call: "Wing wing halo!" 🤪
Bully: I can't understand you because I don't speak ugly language.
Me: And I don't speak idiot language.
"So what, ah, my G?"
Who was in Paris?
I dunno, the title was censored.
"My name is Dezz."
Corpses aren’t funny—they’re dead serious.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Spell.
Spell who?
W. H. O.
Are you Spanish, because I will say "Hola."
Do you go to a biblioteca? Also, in Spanish, you will never guess the word "biblioteca." Find it, I dare you.
Are you French? Because I Eiffel for you.
