Language jokes
Your mom is so fat, she starts with the letter O in the alphabet because O.B.C.D. (Obesity).
To whoever @heil dem anfuhrer is, I hope you know I can’t understand what you’re saying. So next time you get on an American website, please speak English, and I don’t speak whatever European language that is.😊
My cousin’s friend spelled “racist” wrong and when my cousin showed me, the first thing I said to my cousin’s friend is “Go to Grammarly. They REALLY teach you spelling.”
Why could dinosaurs not talk? Because they were dead.
French jab is ban French's backwards.
What does the "f" in "orphan" stand for? Family, but there's no "f".
Why do we call them dead bodies? Nobody says "alive bodies!" Like you walk into your workplace, "OMFG IT'S FULL OF BODIES! Alive ones, though." You wouldn't give birth and say, "Come on, husband, help me with the bodies." If it's a surprise party, you wouldn't say, "QUICK, HIDE THE BODIES!" And the person who the party was for wouldn't say "OH MY GOD WHY ARE THEY DEAD!"
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Leaf. “Leaf” who? Leaf my house, or else you will regret it. You don’t live here, you dumb idiot! ?!
Say: "eye"
Spell: map
Then say: "enis."
Did you know the F in orphan stands for family?
(There is no F in orphan.)
The E and F in Orphan stands for Every one in their Family.
Me: yep they definitely have one 100% 💯
Does this sentence make any sense?
What does a man have 3 of, which a girl only has 2 of?
Legs.
Me: Ice woman diary: a witch's tin key.
Other: What? You said, "I swim in diarrhea, which is stinky?"
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Little old lady.
Little old lady who?
Little old lady, you don't need to yodel about it. Yodel who? Yodel who?
I asked my French mate if he had a games console. He said, "Oui!"
Why were there so many victims in the Grenfell flat fire disaster in London?
All the exit signs were in English.
Spell "I cup."
You're old enough to remember when emojis were called "hieroglyphics."
A guy told me, "Nothing rhymes with orange."
So I replied, "No, it doesn't."