Kill jokes
If you had a friend like me, would you kill me?
Why can't you run with a pencil in the hallway? Because too many people got killed!
Why did the blind man get killed? Because he never saw it coming.
Why are planes the most dangerous killers?
Because they killed 2,996 people in 10-25 minutes.
"Talking Ben killed me. JK, it was talking me."
Memes
How do you stop a school shooter from killing you?
Tell him you don’t believe in dog.
Why did the orphan kill himself?
What is the difference between Obama and Osama?
Osama didn't kill innocent civilians with missile strikes.
Hey kids, guess who started a micronation?
It’s Barney and Trump. They don’t let gays in, but they kill them.
Why did he kill himself?
Because he is adopted to a fat man who farts.
Why did Hittle kill himself? Because he wanted to buy a car, but then Hittler farted.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Covid.
Covid who?
The thing that killed half a billion people!
My sister said download "Among Us" on my iPad, so I did. Then she taught me to play. Then she told me a code and told me where to put it, and I typed in the code.
Then she was the imposter, and I was a crewmate, so I was sticking with her, and she killed me when we made it to the medbay.
Why is Mercury so hot? I know, because the sun is killing Mercury.
Please don't kill [me].
Kill yourself, hoes!
Why did the Mexican man throw his wife out of the window...
Ta kill her.
Jake grabbed Lina's thigh and said, "Why don't we have sex? I really wanna see your boobs. I bet they're hot." "Yeah, they are." She took her clothes off and he saw her body. "OMG GODDESS OF BOOBS, PUSSYS AND BUTT LETS HAVE SEX LOOK AT MY..." HE WOKE UP THEN CRIED AND KISSED HIS SISTER'S BUTT. SHE SMACKED HIM THEN HE TOOK HER TO HIS BASEMENT AND KILLED HER FROM SEX.
How did Jesus kill himself?
He fell from his bike.
How many times did he die?
Once on a bike and once when he fell from a cloud in Heaven.
Why did the orphan kill himself when he found out who his dad was? Because he found out his dad was Donald Trump.