Kids jokes
An emo kid sees his clothes hanging to dry, and he says to his clothes, "I wish I were you!"
Why do so many kids die in school shootings? Because you're not allowed to run in the corridors.
What makes sad kids jump? A bridge.
Why do orphans like boomerangs more than their parents? The boomerang comes back.
One day I saw a kid cry, so I go, "Let's go find your parents." I miss my job at the orphanage.
Why do orphans get lost on boats? They can't find the home room.
Q: What did the kid on the airplane say?
A: "Those are two nice towers right there."
I threw a dodgeball at a blind kid and got him out... guess I can say he didn't see it coming!
What's common in vampires and American kids?
They both don't get old.
Why did the kid cross the road?
He wasn't wearing his seatbelt.
I'd like to have kids one day.
I don't think I could stand them any longer than that, though.
Why do emo kids hate high fives?
They’re always left hanging.
I saw a kid crying, so I asked him where his parents were, and he started crying more.
Anyway, working at an orphanage is fun.
When the kid in the wheelchair scares you... you wheelie scared me.
Why is the blind kid popular?
He can't see the middle fingers.
I have been charged, because I roasted a kid at a barbeque.
What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs?
Names.
Our teacher told us to write a story about the life of an object that's not alive, so I wrote a story about an emo kid.
I got sent to the principal's office today because I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire and screamed, "HOT WHEELS!"
Kid me: I lost my stick.
Teacher: No, you didn’t.
Kid me: How do you know that?
Teacher: It’s hanging out of your pants.
I saw a kid with no phone. I gave him an iPhone 14.
Except it had no home button.
Your mom is so ugly she made a blind kid cry.