Kids jokes
Q: What do Epstein and Dahmer have in common?
A: They both like to eat kids in and out.
I met a kid at the park. He was holding a picture of his parents in his hands. They had died on 9/11.
So, I went to comfort him. I said, "Hey, I lost my grandpa on 9/11. He was great. At flying a plane."
Autistic kids are like cats. Prove me wrong.
How are rape and airplanes similar?
The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.
How are rape and airplanes similar?
The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.
The penis has a sad life. His hair is always a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor is an asshole, his best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him.
He also stands up for kids who can't defend themselves.
Q: What do you call an angry, bullied Asian kid?
Shoo Ting.
How do Chinese people name their kids?
They throw a wok down the stairs.
How are rape and an airplane similar?
The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.
What do you call a kid with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
“Wanna smoke, kids?” is an offer to do drugs.
“Wanna smoke kids?” is an offer to kill.
How do tourists feed their kids?
Here comes the airplane, here comes the second one.
How do terrorists feed their kids?
"Here comes the airplane... and then the second!"
Kid 1: "It's a bird!"
Kid 2: "It's a plane!"
Me: "It's a terrorist!"
An orphan walked up to St. June's Family Hospital.
Doctor: "Sorry kid, you can't be in here."
Someone prank calls a general. The general hangs up and goes, "Kids these days have no respect for their elders. That's why I send them all to die."
How do you punish blind kids?
Put them in a round room and tell them to sit in the corner.
What do you call an emo kid at the bottom of the ocean?
A good start.
What did the orphan say to the blind kid?\n\n"Hey, we both can't see our parents!"
How do you think they found out cows produce milk?
Two kids having fun in the barn.