Kid jokes
I got in trouble today because I threw a lamp at the emo kid and said, "Lighten up!"
I asked the emo kid how it was hanging. He didn't reply because the rope was too tight.
A few kids were talking about how big their houses were. Kids were pointing to huge houses and huge apartments. One little boy said, "Bet I have the biggest home." To everyone's surprise, he pointed right towards the massive orphanage.
What do you call a horde of Autistic kids?
A zombie Apocalypse!
Uuuuuuhhhhhhhhh🧟
Why do kids prefer to spend more time with their dad than their mom?
They already know that their dad is gonna get "Milk" and never return.
I have been charged, because I roasted a kid at a barbeque.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun? Special forces.
Kid: "Mom, I had a scary dream. Can I come sleep with you and dad?"
Mom: "Sure, sweetie, sleep in the middle."
Kid: "Dad, can you get the remote out of my back?"
Dad: "That isn't the remote."
*Weird background music*
Why do people misplace 9/11 with emo kids? They both have a high death count.
All of you guys in this orphanage are ABCDEFGHIJK.
What's that? said the orphans.
Attractive, brilliant, cute, darling, elegant, funny, gorgeous, and hot.
What's the IJK?
I'm just kidding! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Give a blind kid a gun and tell him it's a hair dryer.
I got detention for giving an emo kid a happy meal.
Why is the blind kid popular?
He can't see the middle fingers.
How does a disabled kid walk to school?
He wishes he had the facilities to.
What's a deaf kid's favorite words?
"Shut up."
One man said, "The audacity on that deaf kid!"
The other man said, "Bro, does he even have audio?"
Q: Why was the depressed kid sad on Christmas?
A: They weren't hanging like the ornaments on a tree.
If you were driving when all of a sudden a young kid and an old man run right in front of you, what do you hit?
The brakes, you sick bastard.
What are Emo kids good at... hanging around?
To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos.
Then I made pizza because they don’t live in a swing state.