Kid jokes
What do you call a terrorist in a kids' swimming pool?
A bath bomb.
When the school shooter walks by the emo kid and doesn’t feel his gun anymore.
When the school shooter gives the autistic kid a glock and he shoots himself, thinking it’s a cigarette.
What's the benefit of taking a depressed kid to the store?
Scan the wrist and you might get a discount.
The emo kid tried to high five the tree.
But the tree left him hanging.
What did the momma grape say to the pappa grape?
"Raisin' our kids is usually pretty fun, but sometimes they get sunburn and I have to take them to the doctor for dry skin."
When you're the only one bullying the weird kid and you're absent on the day he shoots up the school. ̄\_(ツ)_/ ̄
Comments of Gwen in her bra!
Jordan Jadoke: Wow such a good looking kid!
Heo: Dude stop! Who the hell got this!
prince/mr tallie: Hey stop!
YOU: Sexy sexy sexxy! How much does she cost!
Kenya Bailey: NOTHING SHE IS NOT A SEX SLAVE SHE IS PERSON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Fuck u Kenya: SHUT UP!
Big Ideas: Do u think I hav a chance with her? Cause if then SWEET!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kariah: STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mariah: U GUYS EXPECT PRINCE, HEO, AND KENYA ARE GOOD PEOPLE THAT ARE NOT CHILD MOLESTERS!!!!!!!!!!
Hot: 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Fring: I want to take u home all to my self!
Why don't Chinese kids celebrate Christmas?
Because they make the toys.
When the school shooter says, "Everybody get down!" and the autistic kid thinks it's Simon Says: 🙋♂️🙋♂️🙋♂️
What do kids and drugs have in common? I sell both of them.
if a toy from Toy Story died, the kid wouldn't know, and the other toys would just have to watch as their kid played with the corpse.
Me running after slapping the emo kid's wrist and saying, "I like ya cut g."
Why can't two Asians have a white kid?
Because two wongs don't make a white.
My little cousin's birthday was in a few days, and his mom said he wanted Hot Wheels. So I sent him a video of me pushing a paralyzed kid into fire and screaming "HOT WHEELS!"
Kid: Your mom!
Orphan: (cries)
Why can’t Helen Keller have kids?
Answer: She’s dead.
There's a kid named Little Johnny who would always cuss. Well, one day, he was sitting in class and the teacher said, "Let's play a game." So the game was she calls out a letter and someone raises her hand and tells her a word that begins with that letter. The teacher says "A". Little Johnny raises his hand and the teacher thinks to herself, "Well, he might say something like a**." So the teacher calls on Sally. Sally says "apple". The teacher says "B". Little Johnny raises his hand. The teacher thought, "No, he might say something like b!tch." So the teacher goes all the way to R. The teacher says "R". Little Johnny raises his hand and says, "Me, me, please, I really know one." Then the teacher thinks to herself, "Well, there's no cuss word that starts with R," so she said, "Okay, Johnny, give me a word that starts with R." Little Johnny says, "A rat!" and the teacher, very pleased, says, "Very good, Johnny. What type of rat?" Little Johnny says, "A big gosh damn mother freaker."
Sorry, I had to edit some word, but y'all know what I meant.
When the school shooter pulls the fire alarm, and the autistic kid thinks it’s a rave party.
Kid: My parents want to meet you, you wanna come over?
Orphan: Na, I'm good. I'm going to watch Home Alone. It's the only movie that I can think of that's related to me.