Key jokes

I love the smell of my F5 key. It's very refreshing.

What does Stephen Hawking press after he's had a hard day? F5

How do you enter your house?

Through Bill Gates!

What did the substrate say to the active site?

"C'mon baby, we fit together, open my door lock to f**kin' key."

Mary had a little lamb.

Key word is had, her dad's favorite meat is a human!

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Key.

Key who?

Key moo.

Your mama is so stupid.

Your dad said, "You're driving me crazy," so your mom handed him the keys and said, "You can drive."

Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys? He was playing by ear.

What is the difference between a man peering through the key hole and a woman in the bath?

One is rude and nosy; the other is rude and nosy.

Danny just bought a new game from Steam for a penny.

About one hour later, Danny asks his mother: "Mom, I am not able to start the game."

Mom asked, "Why?"

Danny answers: "It says 'Press any key' on the screen, but I can't find an 'Any' button on my keyboard."

Me: Ice woman diary: a witch's tin key.

Other: What? You said, "I swim in diarrhea, which is stinky?"

Well, a lock and a key were going on vacation, but the key said, "Help me, I'm stuck!" and then the lock said, "I think I am in lock-shary."

Where is the worst place to lock your keys in your car?

The anti-abortion clinic because you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger.

What do you do when you get locked outside your house? You talk to the lock, because communication is key.

What’s the key to a successful relationship?

Consent.