Joke jokes
How do you make holy water?
You boil the hell out of it.
What did the frog say to the pedophile?
Stephen Hawking and his wife Siri’s favorite place to eat is Meals on Wheels!
Why did your mum touch me? Because she was a pedo.
A kindergarten teacher was telling a story...
A kindergarten teacher was telling a story about a farmer walking around the farm talking to the animals. She was trying to get the kids to interact, speak up, and to use their imaginations.
"Mister Farmer stopped at the cow, and the cow said 'Morning, Mister Farmer!'. Susie, what do you thing the farmer said next?"
Susie says "He said 'Good morning Mrs. Cow!'"
"Mister Farmer stopped at the pig next, and the pig said 'Good morning, Mister Farmer!'. Johnny, what do you thing the farmer said next?"
Johnny says "He said 'Good morning Mr. Pig!'"
"Mister Farmer stopped at the chicken, and the Chicken said 'Morning, Mister Farmer!'. Billy, what do you thing the farmer said next?"
Billy says "The farmer said 'Holy shit, that chicken is fucking talking!'"
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: “What the hell was that all about?”
Ha, Uranus face!
Not in a racist way tho.
What's the difference between a Ferrari and a sack of dead babies?
I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.
Yo mama's so hot when she walked into Subway she gave me a foot long!
Q: Why can't Helen Keller drive?
A: Because she's a woman.
Who's Hitler's best friend? Nazis me.
What did the clock say when it got punched at noon?
It’s twelve o'clock.
More like so they can fuck him, am I right?
What do you call a bad "egg" meme?
Deep fried!
Note to all.
My name is Lariah. Lariah Carla Brown, 14 years old and I am 1 of triplets. I don't understand how rape jokes are funny, and I just want to make that statement clear. I also hate orphan jokes because I WAS one. Notice when I put WAS! I also see jokes about cancer, now I know you can't be kidding. You know that cancer is a disease that many people get and could die from, so you are just wrong about that!
The person who is reading this.
How many rapists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Punchline: One, but they prefer soda bottles instead.
Why did Michael Jackson name his kid Blanket?
What would you call a cover for your cock?
What’s the difference between Juice WRLD and George Floyd?
Nothing, they both can’t breathe.
Ok, I found this off of an internet meme, this isn't original:
*grabbing kid* Harambe: Ok kid, I don't have much time, but Obama's last name is- *gunshot*