Joke jokes
What do you call a AK-47 that lost 1 point?
An AK-46.
Me: Knock knock.
My sister: Who's there?
Me: I eat mop.
My sister: I eat mop who?
My mind: I eat my poo.
My sister getting it.
Ha, orphans are soooooo funny. I mean, they have many family stories. Oh wait...
What do you call a Chinese hooker that won't get on her knees?
Cantonese...
A morbid joke would be what's going on in my mind.
This isn't an orphan joke, but I got a job at a library, but it only lasted 15 minutes. Turns out, books about women’s rights shouldn’t go in the Sci-Fi / Fantasy section.
Someone asked me what the lines on my wrist were from. I answered, "My cat has OCD."
Girlfriend: You remind me of a cell phone.
Girlfriend's ex: Why?
Girlfriend: Because you're about to die.
Hey.
Girl: Hey.
Damn, I forgot my spray bottle.
Girl: What?
It says "spray on flat surfaces."
Tell an emo, "Do you get jealous when your phone dies?"
Friend: Your t-shirt is cringe.
Me: You should go get the Covid test because one of their symptoms is no taste.
Talking about planets with my nephew.
He asked if you could plow thru Uranus because it's all gas.
No joke. I just want to say that my thoughts are with the Ukrainian people, and I wish them the best. Best of luck.
Why was the emo mad?
The picture got hung, not her.
What do you say when a cat says "me moaw"?
The cat says "me toooo!"
How to surprise a blind man: put a plunger in the toilet!
What takes 10 seconds to go SLPAT! on the ground?
9/11 victim!
Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be water melon.
A child molester and a priest walk into a bar. He orders a drink.
My friend who is in a wheelchair told me a joke, and I burst out laughing. I told him he should be a stand-up comedian.