Joke jokes
What does a Tusken Raider eat after his meal?
Some desert!
Want to hear a joke, huh?
Me........
Why did the pedo cross the road?
To get to the pre-school on the other side.
What's tall, has a twin, and is in Manhattan?
Nothing, Bin Laden destroyed them all.
You know why I have so low IQ? It's because the left side of my brain gets nothing right, and the right side of my brain has nothing left.
Wanna hear a joooooooke?
Your life.
What did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side. 😂😂😂
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire? Hot wheels!
A joke: my life, hahahahaha! Wait, it's not funny.
Where do you find a cow with no legs?
Right where you left it!
So a man asked another man, "What's your name?"
He says, "What's it to ya?"
So the guy asked again, "And he says what's it to ya?"
Come to find out his name was What's It To Ya.
Q: Where did Sally go on her bike? A: Nowhere.
So, a neutron went to a bar. He asked the bartender how much for a beer. The bartender said, "For you, no charge."
My dad and I were talking and my cat left the room.
So I said, "I guess she wasn't feline it."
My dad said, "You've got to be kitten me, that was purrfect!"
I said, "Literally."
Mom: See that guy over there with no hands, tell him to clap.
Son: Mom, I'm blind.
Mom: Exactly!
When do you go on red and stop at green?
A watermelon.
10 years ago my dad went to get milk. He said when he got back, he was going to tell me a joke. That joke better be worth it!
Q: What do you call an angry monkey?
A: Furious George!
I dropped my phone the other day when a guy picked up my phone and started to put it in his pocket.
I said, "Hey, that's my phone," and he said, "First of all, my name isn't 'Hey', it's Jay. Second of all, it's an iPhone, not a 'myPhone'. Get it right."
So a kid asks his dad, "Why was I born?"
The dad replies, "I thought that girl was dead!"