Joke jokes
Why did the man die of the actor's performance?
The performance was unbeLIVEable!
Three guys walk into a room where a man is sitting with an assortment of foods on his plate because it's lunchtime. The guys ask the man to do a favor, and he says, "Sorry guys, I have a lot on my plate!"
Son: Hi Dad, I'm Son.
Dad: Hi Son, I'm Leaving You.
Years later:
Dad still did not come back.
What did the vegetable say to the other before the fight?
Time to beet your maker.
People who make puns always get pun-ched by people.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Water.
Water who?
Water you waiting for, just let me in!
Q: Why did the baby cross the road?
A: It wasn't in its car seat.
What's a car's favorite place to hang out?
A CARnival!
Why did Princess Di cross the road?
Momentum.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Iceberg lettuce. Iceberg lettuce who? Iceberg! Let us in!
Knock knock.
- Who's there?
- The doorbell repairer.
What's a goat's favorite video game?
Mario Goat Cart!
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 was a registered *sex* offender.
Cremation, the last chance to have a smoking hot body.
"Knock Knock..."
"Who's There?"
"Kenya"
"Kenya who?"
"KENYA OPEN THE DOOR IT'S FREEZING OUT HERE!!!!"
How did the Skeleton know it was gonna rain?
He read the weather forecast.
What's a queen's favorite drink? Royal-tea!
Confucius say, "Man who bite electric wire get shocking experience!"
My ex misses me, good thing she'll never hit me.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you a lot!