Joke

Joke jokes

Height

Store owner: You have to be 40 inches tall to go into the adult section.

Kid: Please.

Store owner: Oh okay, but get on your tippy toes.

Kid: Everybody is hugging.

Sex

How fast is the speed of sex?

68 because at 69 you've got to turn around.

Pilot

“Who are the fastest readers in the world?”

“The 9/11 pilots, they did 30 stories in 7 seconds.”

Pornstar

What’s the difference between a pornstar covered in slime and The White Stripes?

One has "Icky Thump," and the other does "icky hump."

Orphan

What do orphans and broken up couples have in common?

They can't see each other anymore.

School

Me rn: "Yo yo yo, for pre-K I went to K.I.S.S. a school."

My friend: "What is K.I.S.M.A.?"

Me: "K.I.S.M.A. balls!"

KFC

What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period?

One’s finger-licking good and the other is just a fast food restaurant.

Orphan

Why do orphans love going to church?

Because they can call someone "father."

Cannibal

"Hey, man, do you have any Ben and Jerry's?"

"Yeah, I have two of them, fresh and preserved in the freezer."

"I meant the ice cream, bro..."