Joke

Joke jokes

Height

You're so tall you can go see God, but you're so tall your balls got small.

Nut

*at school*

Nobody: Do you want nuts?

Me: Wait, you have some?

Nobody: Yeah, they're my own.

Me: :0

Man

You just shot an unarmed man.

Well, he should have armed himself then.

Pirate

Why don't pirates take a shower before walking the plank?

They just wash up on shore.

Orphan

Why can't an orphan use an Apple iPad?

Because it can't find the home button...

Orphan

Guys, we need to stop telling orphan jokes, they're gonna tell their parents. Oh wait, never mind, continue.

Orphan

Me: I hit an orphan!

Mom: OMG WHY?

Me: Not like they can tell their parents-

Cheetah

I bet when 2 cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one says, "You're such a cheetah!" Then they laugh and go and eat a zebra or whatever.

Plumber

I have a better version of this joke.

How to make a plumber cry: Simple, kill his family. That’ll definitely turn on the waterworks.

Baby

I made a joke about putting babies in the microwave and got told I was a disgusting person.

So from now on I’ll only make baby in the deep fryer jokes.