Joke jokes
What did the salad dressing say to the tomato?
"Don't look! I'm dressing!"
Why did C.S.C fail the Trig test? Cosecant remember his own name! Mwahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
What do you call a cow that doesn't produce any milk? An udder failure.
Are you an egg, because you crack me up?
What is it called when you whoop a donkey?
A whooped ass and apparently some people get that everyday from their drunk dads.
What's the difference between a plane and a woman?
At least the plane doesn't give you herpes when it crashes at your place.
How many shades of gray does it take to make a dirty movie?
50.
I read a story about a rabbit being raised. It was a hare-raising tale!
What is red and green and goes 100 miles per hour?
A frog in a blender.
Hey, you wanna hear something funny?
An atom makes up everything. Half of this site contains this joke. Don't trust the internet, kids.
I'd make a joke about corn, but it's too corny.
Then again, I could make a joke about eyes, but that would be even cornea. My funny bone is broken. I guess it was because those jokes were too humerus.
Have you heard the new pickup line in a gay bar?
Can I push your stool in for ya?
What did the bus driver say to the nut 🥜?
"Where do you live?"
What do you call a person whose Lymphoma keeps recurring?
A Lymphomaniac.
What’s the worst part of being a pedophile?
Getting the blood out of your clown suit.
Yo Father, don't use the baptism bath. I cleaned my anal plug in there.
What?
The holy water gets all the ass off. Don't mind the white stuff. *clears throat*
Once I told an abortion joke and this woman was like, "I've had an abortion, that's offensive." And I was like, "I just tell jokes, I think what you do is much worse."
Why did Hitler die? He got hit by 'ler'.
Hey, did you know Paul Walker's gay?
Why do you say that?
Because he likes to wrap himself around long, old wood.
What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose?
Full.