Joke

Joke jokes

Dad

What is the difference between your dad and a video game?

Your dad doesn’t beat you.

Kilt

Why do you Scotchmen wear kilts?

Because sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

Slave

What does a pregnant slave and a "pay less" sale have in common?

Buy one, get one free.

Guy

Did you hear about the deaf guy's STI?

He got hearing aids.

School

The fact I couldn't hear the announcements at my school because the boys in my advisory are clapping with no hands should be a joke just in itself. They were making sexual faces as well, oh, and don't forget the moaning they do.

Funeral

My grandma always looks at me when we go to a wedding and says, "You’re next!"

When we attend a funeral, I say, "You’re next!"

Cop

How does the cop respond to being called racist?

He said, "How can I be racist? My wife's eyes [are] black."

Difference

What’s the difference between a fly and Lady Diana?

The sound when they hit the windshield.

Emo

I asked the emo kid if he was depressed that his phone died before him.

Priest

What’s a priest's favorite sport?

Golf, because most of the holes are less than 18.

Penis

I call my penis the truth because the truth always comes out of children’s mouths.