Joke

Joke jokes

Lie

Dad: Johnny, Johnny?

Johnny: Yes, Papa.

Dad: Getting women?

Johnny: Yes, Papa.

Dad: Telling lies?

Johnny: No, Papa.

Dad: Well, you're 100% lying because you get NO WOMEN!

House

So I went to my friend's house and he told me to make myself at home, so I kicked him out. I don't like visitors.

Fuel

Yo... Kobe, you're going down man. Did you forget the low grade fuel?

Page

"When someone asks for a dad joke and you send them to the orphan page."

Nut

Do you know Wildee?

What's that?

Will deez nuts fit into your mouth?

Opposition

If Opposition Expunged thought he was an animal, what would Thearchy be called?

Therianarchy!

Poker

Why does the Queen play poker on the toilet?

Because she always gets a Royal flush!

Victim

Q. What do filicide jokes and filicide victims have in common?

A. They never get old.

Orphan

Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?

Friend: Why?

Me: Because they don't have a mother or father's day.

Emo

Q: Why can emos wear dog collars at school, but people can't wear hats? WTF school!

Fire

Saying a Kobe joke after he died tends to ignite a fire in the people you say it to.