Joke jokes
What did the drunk emo say to the bartender?
Nothing, she was hung over.
Why does everyone call me racist?
My shadow is black.
What's the difference between your dad and grocery shopping?
He didn't come back with the milk.
Why did the rapper go to the seafood restaurant?
Because he heard they had PHAT BASS.
So you're offended by midget jokes? C'mon, grow up!
What's the difference between me and cancer?
Well, my dad couldn't beat cancer.
Arik? (Not a joke.)
What does a dog do in a dresser?
It pants!
What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in the bathtub?
Throw in some laundry...
Why did Daveon go to the doctor?
Because he was feeling "Daveon" in the dumps.
How many Daveons does it take to change a lightbulb? None, he prefers to stay in the dark.
Why did Daveon get fired from his job at the orange juice factory? Because he couldn't concentrate.
What did Daveon say when he saw a spider? "I'm Dave-on with this!"
Last year, I gave my brother a BB gun for his birthday. He gave me a T-shirt with a bullseye on it.
I asked him what the bullseye was for. He said, "Target practice."
I ran into a fat woman today. She said next time, don't hit me. I said I don't think I have enough gas to go around.
Then the ground started to rumble with every step she took.
I met a fat chick at the beach.
People started asking me what I use for bait, or do you want us to help throw the whale back in the water?
"Nice pants. Can I test the zipper?"
Daveon says, "Oh wow, she's so beautiful!" The doctor then says, "Yes, but sadly, your wife didn't make it..." Daveon then states, "Give me the one my wife made then!"
What did the beat say to the rapper?
"Drop it like it's HOT!"
What do you call a gender neutral person who is lactose intolerant non-bi dairy?