Joke jokes
What do you call a fish with two knees?
How does an octopus laugh? Buble buble.
I told my sister a Dairy joke.
She said it was cheesy.
Have you heard about the animal that was made of a human hand?
It's an ARMadillo.
What would you call four Mexicans drowning in a lake?
*Answer: Quatro Cinco*
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Por que.
Por que who?
"That's all, folks," in the words of Por que Pig.
So my ex invited me to dinner with her new boyfriend.
Her boyfriend said "Hi."
I said, "Knife to meet you!"
I would tell a pussy joke, but you would never get it.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.
She looked at me surprised.
(P.S. I am not at that age plus I am as straight as a helix ruler.)
A father is talking to his three kids.
Kid 1: Why is my name Rose?
Dad: Because when you were a kid, a rose fell on your head.
Kid 2: Why is my name Lily?
Dad: Because a lily fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid 3: Auughhghhhggghhh!
Dad: Oh hey, Brick.
A Roman walks into a bar and orders a martinus. The bartender says, "Don't you mean a Martini?" The Roman then says, "Look, if I want a double, I'll ask for one."
The past, present, and future walk into a bar.
It gets really tense.
Technoblade: Makes jokes about orphans while in hospital.
Doctors to Technoblade's dad: Sorry for your loss.
Technoblade: What do you mean?? I'm right here!!
Orphans found parents: Who's he talking to??
Yo mama so fat, when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the concrete laughed up.
I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hairdryer.
A man and a giraffe walk into a bar. The man orders a beer, one for him and one for the giraffe.
After they finish their drinks, the giraffe falls over, and the man gets his stuff and heads for the door.
The bartender says, "Stop! You can't leave that thing lying on the floor!"
The man says, "Mate, that's not a lion, it's a giraffe."
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It doesn't matter, he's dead.
What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Student: Hey! Did you hear the joke about the three holes in the ground?
Teacher: No?
Student: All I can say about it is, "Well, well, well."
Hey girl, are you osteoporosis, because you're giving me a "bone" condition.